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20 Ways Not to Talk To Your Teenage Daughter – Then How to Fix Things

By Laurie Hollman, Ph.D., author UNLOCKING PARENTAL INTELLIGENCE February 4, 2016

Teenage girls are sensitive to the way people in authority talk to them, especially their mothers.

They are easily wounded, feel criticized, and vulnerable when they sense or get outright disapproval. However, even the most devoted mothers are only trying to shape them up to be young women and don’t understand their sensitive narcissism.

18 Sentences to Avoid When Mothers Talk to Their Daughters

1.      “You are such a disappointment.”

2.      “Don’t you ever listen?”

3.      “Fix your hair.”

4.      “Are you really going to wear that?”

5.      “Who were you on the phone with?”

6.      “When are you going to talk to that teacher?”

7.      “Get it together.”

8.      “That’s a terrible habit. Stop biting your nails.”

9.      “Give it up. Just apologize!”

10.  “You’re too sensitive.”

11.  “Mothers are people, too.”

12.   “Clean your room.”

13.   “Finish your college essays.”

14.   “Let me read your college essays.”

15.  “Watch what you eat.”

16.  “Play with your brother.”

17.   “Keep your hands off your face.”

18.   “Don’t you ever think?”

19.  “Now you’ve done it.”

20.  “It’s really for your own good.”

 

Why Your Daughter Keeps Her Distance

 

The likelihood that your daughter keeps her distance when she hears such remarks on a scale of 1-10 is sadly 10. She’s sure you don’t understand her, don’t really care, think only how you want her to look for your friends, think she’s not a good enough of a person, and deep down disapprove of her in general, nevertheless, as a growing young woman. Hopefully, not all of that—but probably some of that.

 

What’s a caring mother to do?